I’m Unbuckled on the Roller Coaster. And I Like It.

When the email I’d been waiting for suddenly popped up in my inbox, I was overwhelmed. Of course, I clicked on that magical subject line…and then my old friend Anxiety tapped on my shoulder.

What if this is another rejection?
Could it be an acceptance?
Why would it be anything other than a “no”?
Really. It probably is a “thank you, but no thank you,” so get on with it.
But you’ve worked hard, so this could be it!

In the short span of a couple of seconds, I had rejoiced seeing the email, worried about what it said and simultaneously ripped the credit from God. I wanted control of the email contents—to see the culmination of my hard work in definitive Times New Roman font. But as my computer suddenly lagged, I clicked off of the email before it loaded. My heart rate galloped like I was unbuckled and staring down the first drop of a roller coaster.


So I stopped and prayed.

There is something to be said about turning to God in a moment that could turn out to be potentially life changing for the good. I also started typing this blog post, to solidify my heart’s desire to seek the Lord in the answer of this particular email—no matter how the sender replies. It is innately more intimate to rush to God in a conceivable triumph. It allows Him the glory in every part of my life.

I guess I’ll go open the email now. My parting words to my now seven (thanks Cathy!) readers? Turn to God when your heart is thudding in your chest with good news. Run to His arms and give Him thanks for the chance that He gave you to succeed or fail. Either way, it is His plan. And that’s something to be peaceful about.

Now, I’m going to open that email for sure this time. Nope…not going to keep putting it off. No matter if Hubs is standing over my shoulder, like the old Mervyn’s commercial:



About sarahb5149

When tasked with how to describe myself, I get quiet, leading people to believe that I am trying to come up with something deep and meaningful. In fact, I am trying to decide which to display without confusing them. I'm a Christian. And that doesn't mean that I simply say it - I love the Lord and have figured out over the years that He knows what He's doing, even when I am stomping my feet or looking at Him like I have no clue what is going on (*hint* it happens more than I'd care to admit). Writing has been a passion of mine since I was a wee lil' thing; I kept my first poem in all of it's stammering, unevenness. Wife and mom, daughter and sister, aunt and Sunday School teacher, I adore the roles that God has given me. A bit of a sci-fi nerd, geek and self proclaimed dork, there isn't much that I won't try at least once...unless it involves mayonnaise because that stuff is just gross. View all posts by sarahb5149

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